i am at a point in my doubt and recovery process where i feel almost completely agnostic.
i am an empiricist; evidence required, please!
) of what i was taught as a witness has been discarded.
They like to play on our fears making people think 'what if?'. I think the feeling is a natural one when we had it drummed into us for so long. Its not based on facts but on emotion. Each time this happens and you counter it with reasoned arguments the less it will happen. None of us knows the future and there are some scary things going on around us, but equaly there are many good and wonderful things too - depends on how we choose to look at it.
CS 101
but i am afraid to send a letter to my old kh.
what should i write to make sure they don't just df me?
also, they refused my request to da myself before.
My own reaction was to not play by their rules so I just left. Later I came here and realised how healthy it was to write a letter to formally terminate your association with them. I can see many people gained satisfaction from doing so.
Because I just walked away, they later found reason to disfellowship me. They found out where I was living and tried to invite me to a judicial hearing, which I refused. I felt that they were trying to control me still, now I cant give a rats arse about it, but I would still have loved to have stuck up the proverbial two fingers by me doing the terminating not them.
CS 101
2 days ago i received a phone call from an elder that recently moved to the cong i was in.. this elder is the type that feels that he is a big shot!
he gives parts in dc and ca's.. he asked me if he can come to visit, i told him that my husband had to be present and he had to call in advance to make an appointment.. this elder is so obnoxious and treat women as a 2nd class citizens.
any suggestions?.
These type of Elders are quite common, they seem to move congregations like its going out of fashion and stir everything up, trying to sort out all the problems they percieve a congregation has. They end up upsetting everyone before they move on to their next victims.
CS 101
my boyfriend and i were having all sorts of problems for the past couple months.
we have been together about 2 and a half years (which, to me, is quite awhile) and it was great for awhile but now i really keep discovering things he lies about to me.
like some are stupid little things, and others are big things... and i just cannot take that anymore.
Trust and honest communication are the back bone of a good relationship, so you did the right thing in ending it. Although he may have his reasons for lying it doesnt change the fact that a relationship cant easily survive when you cant trust a person. It sounds like he need to resolve those issue's he has before contemplating another relationship, maybe by professional help. The initial period after will be raw for you both, so i'm not suprised he wants all or nothing. Best to give that time to both him and yourself and who knows maybe you can still be friends in the future.
CS 101
in the 1990's there were a lot of things that had the saying "no fear" on it and one of the local elders figured out that this meant we live life and do things without fear.
so that basically we could try things and take chances, without the normal fear we associate with things in life.
well in a special needs talk they decided that "no fear" t shirts should not be worn by good witnesses and they asked that we not wear them to witness gatherings, or even in life.
Any other Brits here remember the trend to wear the 'Relax' t-shirts? It was because of Frankie Goes to Hollywood's song. Sisters were reported to have worn them at conventions. I guess that would have been a late 80's trend?
CS 101
well... i've finally worked up the courage to get an account & start posting on this site.
i've been lurking for a couple of months now, voraciously reading all the, mmm, "delightful words of truth" i've found here.
i'm currently deep in dubdom, so i have to be pretty ambiguous about some personal details, (i'm really paranoid, hopefully that will pass :-/) but my story in a nutshell is: i was born into this religion, baptised in my mid teens, happily married to a wonderful (& thankfully, somewhat open-minded) jw lady, & now, several years later, i'm starting to seriously question some of what i believe.
Thats really good to hear that your mind is open to really evaluating everything thats your life has been built around. Its all to easy to ignore those impulses when we fear what we might loose or who we'll upset (ourselves included) but only by a serious and frank look at our lives can we move forward and be truely happy.
Welcome to you and wish you a good (ultimately) journey.
CS 101
i just got this in my email.
has anyone heard this one yet?.
this is an experience from andre' r_____, overseer, just back from the branch committee course at patterson: in england, one of our blind brothers had a seeing-eye dog that would faithfully guide and take him to the meetings each week.
I love the way that its obviously Jehovah that directed the dog!
CS 101
i may not post much cause i'm really busy with work and raising 3 grandkids but some times see posts i would like to comment on.
glad to meet all of you.. later, .
wifey
Nice to see a new member, welcome
CS 101
i have been out for 4 years now, and find it hard to meet someone who i find is compatible.
one of the reasons being is that they haven`t experienced what it is like to come out of a cult, and i find there is a void there.
does anyone else feel like this?
In my experience, you need to find someone that can be patient with you as you learn to adapt to real life again, your descision making process will be impared and emotional development will be lower having had your life mapped out by someone else for so long.
What helped me was a few things: 1. Time - the further away I got from the JW mentallity, the anger I had of it and so on the easier its been. 2. Research - I spent a good while looking at the Bible, the witness doctrines and my life. That enabled me to see where they (and therefore I) had gone wrong and why I felt the way I did. 3 Make today count - Take chances, make mistakes but above all learn from any experience thats happened to you. Try not to live in the past but dont regret what got you to this point either, its makes you who you are.
I am currently in a relationship and sometimes I can't believe it, some of my old low self esteem creeps in and makes me think its too good to be true, but I know that everyone can offer a person something they want and need. If you can be kind, caring, loving, then there is simply no reason why you cant make another person happy is there. I guess you have to put yourself in places where people can meet and interact with you, and the old saying of dont be looking and it will find you might work.
Wishing you a happy life
CS 101
*it is believed that everyone will get judged on judgement day...not as a group, but individually.
why are jws so freakin' concerned with what any one person does with their lives?
why do they care if one of its members "smells the coffee" and thinks for themselves?
This is one things that always bothers me and I often tell my family about it - that to be told what my christian conscience should be by someone else (the governing body, elders etc) is trying to take on their conscience not training my own, and will I be able to say on judgement day 'oh these people said what to do' , no i'll be looking round and realising there is no one behind me to back me up, its me thats being judged not me and all the witnesses together. If you believe in judgement day that is!
CS 101
